The Last Speaker Of Skalwegian

The Last Speaker of Skalwegian is the second novel by American author, David Gardner. It's only after he has been working on the Skalwegian language for three months, after he has applied for and received a hefty government research grant, that linguistics professor Lenny Thorsen realises that Charlie Fox, the last speaker of Skalwegian, might not be the real deal. And that's a problem.

After three years of teaching French at Ghurkin College in the small Massachusetts town of New Skalvik, where he is expected to issue As for football jocks despite non-attendance, Lenny jumps at the chance to document a dying language. Skalwegian was spoken on the tiny island of Skalvik, near Norway, until the population migrated to New Skalvik over two hundred years earlier, and learned English.

Documenting Skalwegian, as Lenny explained to Daniela Fox, the gorgeous co-anchor of News at Noon on local TV station WDRK, might just prevent the extinction of a language, should help with securing tenure, and he just loves the work. But if this counterfeiting of a language is revealed, his career and reputation are ruined.

When Charlie gives a (partial) explanation of why he is virtually creating a new language, Lenny faces a dilemma: the motive is pure, but the consequences of failure or discovery are unthinkable. Before the year is out, Lenny will be the target of four or five assassination attempts, there will be a murder, a kidnapping, and blackmail with regards the stipulations of a lucrative will. And Lenny will, mysteriously, acquire the apparently fearsome title of The Lobsterman.

Gardner's plot is sometimes a little convoluted and involves an element of slapstick and plenty of absurdity, especially with the character names, where there's a bit of nominative determinism going on. There are few ordinary people in this story: almost every character is quirky, weird, strange, odd, or eccentric.

Our linguist is caretaker of a revolving ex-restaurant which sporadically, and quite unpredictably, rotates, where he dines on a frozen cache of lobster tails, boysenberries and ginger and citrus tea, while avoiding cases of mediocre wine. He is easily distracted by words, his thoughts shooting off in tangents as he puzzles over their derivations. And plagued by a guilty secret from his past…

The supporting cast includes an ageing Godiva, a corrupt Police Chief, a money-grubbing college dean siphoning off funds for his personal gain, a local businessman with underworld connections, several hitmen named Bob, and a resourceful army vet. Readers in the mood for silliness, with occasional laugh-out-loud moments and some sweet romance will find this one entertaining. This unbiased review is from an uncorrected proof copy provided by NetGalley and Encircle Publications/Books Go Social.